the ole facebook cock block

I know the definition of a facebook cock block is:When a desperate girl or woman (typically overweight) lights up your Facebook with comments that make it appear as if the two of you are dating. Yet, I also think it is a relevant definition for people who kill your status updates with sappy, sentimental, or irrelevant posts. So I ask: Why on earth do people feel the need to counter my snarky facebook updates with nice remarks or irrelevant posts? If I say I am having a case of the Mondays that is not an invitation to tell me your cat has feline leukemia or your grandma broke a hip. If I write about mutant with 1 eye from church, do not write that you bet he is a nice fella. That is a no shit sherlock comment. I need witty banter involving turkey d, turkey die, Sammy Davis Jr. only had 1 eye. But really what do you do if you constantly have people write nice or stupey comments on your status updates? I want celebrity posts and sarcastic quips...anything else = no dice for me! And if I tell you your kid is cute, return the favor duh!